Friends, sometimes a challenge is good.

Over the past few months I've been talking some with a semi new friend, we'll call her Hope, that I made through physics studying back home and our new church. She's been a great help in getting through some hard days, and I like to think that I've been a good help to her in some problems she's been dealing with, too.

About a week ago she, out of the blue, asked me if I thought that a certain girl, we'll call Jewel, still likes me. This girl, for the record, is the same one that I talked about earlier when I was saying that I discovered that the only girl I've every truly felt for doesn't actually like me. So, I told Hope that I thought my old crush doesn't like me anymore, although she may have before. Hope disagreed, saying that she thought I was wrong, and followed up by asking whether I like her still. I was amused by this for two reasons, I have never told Hope that I like Jewel, and of course, I still liked Jewel, but instead of answering the question I dodged it by asking how she knew I used to like Jewel. Hope was giving in, she asked me "Let me put it this way, if you knew she liked you, would you like her?" I decided to be honest, and replied, "Honestly? I'd be head over heels for her."

We talked a bit more, and the general conclusion from the conversation was that she might still like me, but she may not. In any event it was up to me to tell her my feelings and until I do I won't get either the relationship or the closure that will allow me to move on. The funny thing is, this was not news to me at all, in fact I most likely would have given the same counsel to any friend of mine, had they approached me with the same situation. So, next time I'm home I've decided I will make sure to have a talk with this girl, Jewel, and let her know where I stand. At this point, it is a win-win situation for me because if she has the same feelings for me then that is great, and if she doesn't, then at least I have closure and I can start trying to move on (painful as it may be).

There are three things that I've noticed about this whole experience that I wanted to share.
1) If you have feelings for a girl, be honest with her. It's not going to hurt you, she can't take anything away from you by rejection, and I think a lot of guys will find that most girls, even if they are not interested, aren't going to be super rude about it or anything like that. You are still who you are, and if you continue to trust God, He will show you the way.
2) Sometimes it might be helpful to completely remove yourself from the situation and try to give yourself advice as if you were not the person in question. I don't know how this works in relationships, because that means removing almost all emotion from the picture - which is hard. But heck, it's worth a try.
3) And for all other times when you can't seem to fix the issue yourself, often it takes a friend to help you out. But not just any kiss-up friend, sometimes you need a friend to challenge you. When I was talking with Hope, I started getting a little agitated a few times, but I didn't show that to her because I knew that she was right and I needed the challenging. On the flip side, perhaps you are that friend for someone. Don't be afraid to challenge your friends. Don't be rude, but remember that we all need a kick to get going from time to time, and maybe one of your friends needs that from you!

As for Jewel, when I go home next (spring break) I will talk with her. I'll keep you all updated, I'm sure!

Storm

MLK Weekend adventure

This past weekend was Martin Luther King weekend, and as such we, as cadets, all had a three day weekend with no training to make the most of. And that we did.

As I mentioned somewhere previously, I am from the desert. Now, I pride myself at being able to adapt rather well to new environments, in other words, put me just about anywhere and I'll do alright (it's nothing too special, anyone in shape and not lacking in common sense should be able to adapt well to just about any new situation). I may not have mentioned earlier, however, that I often volunteer to put myself in situations that make me appear rather awkward and out of place. Well, I do that also. I spent this past weekend in New Hampshire with some friends from the Academy.

I've been to his house before, it is set in the rural, mountainous land which gets snow almost every day. Last year I loved it, and this year I expected nothing less. After a 2 hour train ride, and another hour or so on a crowded bus (complete with unceasing baby yelling) we finally arrived in a town near his and were brought to his house by his father.

Saturday morning we woke up to the smell of chocolate chip and blueberry pancakes, prepared by his mother who, by the way, is an outstanding chef! We soon set out for Mt Major, an easy two hour hike to the top. This was a great climb, not necessarily difficult, at least it shouldn't have been, but I am completely new at climbing on ice. I've always climbed toes-in, because on a rocky hillside that is the best way to control your balance and grip. On Mt Major I did nothing but slip all over the place and nearly slid down a 50ft ice face. One of my friends told me I should start using the sides of my feet instead, and that made all the difference. Too bad he told me when we were nearly at the top.... From the top, a vast view of the famous lake, Lake Winnipesaukee, nearly took my breath away. It was amazingly beautiful, and well worth the hike. The return trip was nothing to write home about, just making our way down the side of the mounting, doing some controlled sliding here and there, and all around having a great time.

Our next stop was at the GunStock ski resort, and although we didn't ever strap on skis, we took full advantage of the snow by doing snow tubing. What a blast. I mean, tubing on water is a lot of fun, but this was crazy. Our group of four went all at the same time in one lane, each of us on our own tube, barreling down the side of the mountain! It was great. Cold, but great.

Sunday was a bit less eventful, but just as much fun. We started off the day with some shooting. I sighted in his scoped air rifle and we played around with that for a while. A little later he brought out his single shot 12 gauge and we blew stuff up with that as well. At one point we put a slug through a brass plate. Pretty incredible.

Later on Sunday afternoon we took their white German Shepherd for a walk in the woods. We crossed a newly-unfrozen creek, hoping from ice to rock, to pallet, to more ice. We chunked rocks at the ice trying to break it in the solid parts, but to no avail. We pressed on, deeper into the woods. Further on we came to a frozen swampland and investigated a wooden birdhouse located at the edge of the swamp. This is pretty much how the whole trip went, lots of investigating, exploring, and all around having a nice lazy walk.

Monday we didn't do a whole lot, we left for the Academy pretty early in the day because all of the roads had been covered in about 12 inches of snow the night before and we had no idea of gauging how long it would take to return. They turned out to be alright, we made it back with plenty of time to spare.

All in all, it was an outstanding weekend! Great food, great adventures, and plenty of time outside in the wild, fresh, crisp, snow-covered outdoors. My only regret: it was too short! Ah well, we have decided to make this trip again next year!

A new year, a new semester

This is the last weekend before school starts, and I plan on taking it completely easy. I'll celebrate my birthday tomorrow, maybe catch a movie, and just rest up as much as I can - basking in the life of no responsibility for the last weekend before march sometime!
Engineering students rarely have light loads, and sophomore engineering students are certainly no exception. This last semester I did the best I have since arriving at the Academy - my GPA was higher than all of my freshman year, which is surprising since the classes I was taking this past semester were considerably more challenging than the "basics" of freshman year.

Why am I telling you this? I actually have no reason. Just wanted to throw down an update because it has been a while...
I miss Texas, I miss the wide open plains, the adventurous homeland that some call "wild" but I call home. I miss the crack of my rifle, the embrace of close friends, and the steering wheel in my hand (we cannot drive at the Academy). However, God has been good to me here at the Academy, I have made many great, great friends and as a whole we are our own support group - taking care of each other all the time. Without the amazing people at this school I would have left many months ago.

I think Thomas Edison said it well: I have friends in overalls whose friendship I would not swap for the favor of the kings of the world.

For those of you schooling this next semester, good luck; for those of you working, may you find joy in your work!

A funny thing happens when we have too much

A funny thing happens when we have too much time - we waste it. I have discovered more and more that when I have excess of something, it is easier for me to squander it. This past summer I had about the same amount of leave as I have had for Christmas this year. Last summer, however, I was basically guiding a friend around west Texas. We took a little over a week and covered more than 1700 miles of west and southern Texas, and had a great time doing it. Once he left to spend time with his own family, I only had around 1 week of leave left over and I made very good use of it. I spent time with all of my friends that were in town, played basketball with them, etc. This leave, however, I really haven't made good use of my time. I had nothing planned, and consequently, nothing really got done. I hung out with some friends, met one for racquetball (and am now sitting around waiting for a rolled ankle to heal), and realized that the one girl I have every really loved isn't interested in being more than a friend to me.

I have started noticing a pattern. As a mechanical engineering student I often have an extreme load of homework. I realized this past semester that, regardless of how much homework I had I always finished up around the same time. Even on nights when I had virtually no homework due, I would find ways to distract myself until fairly late, and finally finish up my homework around the same time as usual. This epiphany has got me thinking. If I usually waste what I have excess of in these two areas, perhaps this is a common theme with me. What else do I waste because I have too much of? Immediately it hits me. What is the one thing that has been given to me freely, without end? God's love for me, and for all mankind. Am I wasting the love of my Savior?

I am now thinking about how I treat others. Do I share the love with others like Jesus has shared with me? Just as important: Do I accept the love of Jesus for myself? Or do I know it is there, know it is abundant, and refuse to accept all He has for me? I would submit that yes, I do in fact squander God's love for me, and I don't show the love that He has called us to pour out on those around us.

For any of you who are in the same boat as I am, I encourage you to think about how you deal with the things you have been blessed with having an abundance of (sorry if this feels like a sermon, this is just my musing of the day). Whether it be money, time, Love, or anything else, remember that God has called us to be stewards of everything we are given! I am working on that for myself...

Storm

Girls...encouragement for single dudes

My education program is rather unique for a couple reasons. First, I can only visit home for about 3 weeks at a time, and that happens only twice a year. Secondly, there is not even 1 girl at my institution that I could see myself getting into a serious relationship with. Or even a half-way serious relationship. Or, for that matter, any real relationship at all outside of friendship. That is not to say there are no good girls at my school, nor that I do not have any female friends there - because I do. I am friends with almost every girl at my school, and many back home also.

Here's my problem: every time I come home for a while and relax, visit friends, etc, I really, really start longing for a girlfriend. This is a problem that I have spend many nights in prayer over, and finally got an answer for last night. First, though, some background.

My family is extremely conservative. They were, for the longest time, of the opinion that all three of their boys would "court" their woman before marriage. This was fine to us, until we realized just how near-impossible that would be in this day of age, and how finding someone else who'd actually go for courting would be like trying to find Swarovsky crystal at the thrift mart. So the whole "dating" / "courting" issue with my parents never has been layed out for us and is, to this day, a bit of a gray area (I have decided to approach them about it before I leave for school again).

The other problem, which I was getting at earlier, is that if I want a relationship with a girl it will most likely have to be a girl from around home, because although there are some great people near where my school is, I just haven't yet found a girl to compare with some of the quality Texas gals I grew up with.

Back to the issue. If I am to have a relationship it appears as of now that it will have to be a long distance relationship. Long distance relationships are quite hard on both parties - I know of only one couple who has made that work well, and at my school that is what most people try to make work. So far, I haven't met a girl that I'm attracted to here at home that is willing to make that work. This results in much prayer on my part every time I come home because I desire so badly to have a some form of relationship like that.

Last night was one of those nights, all day I had been feeling pretty blue and angry so that by night I just started praying about it all. God's answer was quick and simple: "I have told you to wait, and you must continue to wait" But God, I have waited for twenty years already. "You are a mechanical engineering student, you don't even have time right now. Wait and I will reward." I am stubborn, But I can make time Lord. "This will be so much easier if you act bravely." That is when it hit me. I had a mental image of me happily spending my time on leave just hanging out with friends, content with what I have already. Sometimes we must wait on the Lord, trust him at his word. We know that God rewards those who follow his commands, and we know that he rewards well. Why not have a good attitude?

I have just finished the book Wild at Heart by John Eldridge. He talks about how we, as men, sometimes must take the road less traveled, and do the unpopular, hard task. It all sounds easy, inspiring even, but when it comes down to it that task is still hard and it's a hard choice to make. For me, and for every single guy out there who has been told "Wait" by God, this is what we must do for now.

Moral of the story: those of us who have been told to wait, it is our calling as men of the Lord to wait for His plan for our lives. I am, and you can also. Remember who you serve, and take pride in His promise for your life. The reward cannot be matched.

Storm

Howdy

As so many have found solace in forms of public journals, or blogs, I too have decided to start my own blog - for two reasons. First, because I believe it would be helpful to me to publish, from time to time, thoughts of my own. And secondly, because I represent what the modern media would consider to be a minority, yet is probably not anywhere near as minor as they would have us believe, and that minority would be a conservative college student with high morals and Christian worldview.

I have assumed the cover name of Storm Harms because I would like, for the time being, to remain anonymous due to my current education position. Storm, because I love storms and all that they represent (storm chasing is an exciting hobby of mine back home), and Harms, because, well, that seems to go well with storm.

So sit back, read away, comment if you feel compelled to, and spread the Love that this world so drastically needs!